Dating the dark side

Large-scale scientific studies suggest that even adaptive competencies become maladaptive if taken to the extreme.

As Rob Kaiser’s research on leadership versatility indicates, overused strengths become weaknesses.

Whereas in the realm of dating, technology has made it easier for people to meet someone and begin a new relationship, in the world of work people seemed resigned to their bleak state of affairs.Along with blinding leaders to improvement opportunities and detaching them from reality, leadership pipelines are corroded with resilient leaders who were nominated as high-potentials but have no genuine talent for leadership.To explain this phenomenon, sociobiologists David Sloan Wilson and E. Wilson argue that within any group of people — whether a work team or presidential candidates — the person who wins, and is therefore named the group’s leader, is generally very resilient or “gritty.” However, there is something more important going on in human affairs than internal politics, and competition within groups is less important than groups — such as Apple going head to head with Microsoft on technological innovations, Coca-Cola trying to outmaneuver Pepsi’s marketing campaigns, or, in evolutionary terms, how our ancestors fought for territory against rival teams 10,000 years ago.They become emotionally volatile and scared of rejection.And consequently, they move away from groups, put up walls to avoid being criticized, and openly admit faults as a way to guard against public shaming.